Things That Should Happen to Zelda Characters
by QuEeN oF tHe RaBiD pOlAr BeArS
Summary: My little fic of things that should have happened to Zelda Characters
1. Things That Should Have Happened To Zeld...

Things that should of happened to Zelda. Very short, ill warn you, and Zelda gets hurt in every one of 'em, so I enjoyed writing them very much.  
  
BTW: TTSOHTZ stands 4 Thing That Should Of Happened To Zelda  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zelda, because if I did, I would be spending my millions, not writing fics.  
  
  
  
***____________________________________________________________***  
  
TTSOHTZ #1:  
  
( when Zelda throws the ocarina in the river 4 Link)  
  
  
  
Zelda: (throws ocarina, but WAY too hard, falls off and breaks about every bone except her ribs)  
  
Link: ? Cool!!!!! ( jumps on horse) IM OUTTA HERE!!!!!!!  
  
  
  
***______________________________________________________________***  
  
TTSOHTZ #2 :  
  
(when Zelda has just finished telling Link about her dreams)  
  
Zelda: Isn't that odd?  
  
Link: (suddenly awake) Wha? Oh, uh, yeah, I guess…  
  
Zelda: Were you even listening? (Zelda-slaps link as hard as she can, which isn't hard at all)  
  
Link: Slap me will ya? (takes out sword and chops off Zelda's hair and cuts her ugly mug right down the cheek)  
  
***_____________________________________________________________***  
  
TTSOHTZ #3:  
  
(When they show Zelda in that glass thing in Ganons Castle)  
  
Zelda: HEEEEELLLPPP MMME!!!!!IM TOO WEAK TO HELP MYSELF!!!HELP ME!!!!!  
  
Ganon: (deep, evil laugh) BWAHAHAH!!!!!  
  
Link: Yeah, right, like im gonna save you…..  
  
Ganon and Link: (both fall on floor, laughing) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  
  
Zelda: (Glass thing breaks, and she falls, breaking her leg) GACK!!!OWWW!!!!!!HELP!!!!  
  
***_____________________________________________________________***  
  
TTSOHTZ #4  
  
( when Zelda and link come into that room w/the Stalfos)  
  
Link: (goes out of the room, leaving Zelda w/the Stalfos, and running out of the Castle finding me waiting there)  
  
Me: Linky!!!!!!What took you so long? Did you get rid of…her?  
  
Link: Yup!!!!! Lets go back to my house and have Cocoa Puffs!!!!!  
  
Me: Ok!!!!!  
  
***______________________________________________________________________***  
  
And that's the end of my fic!!!!!(curtains close) 


	2. Things that Should Have Happened To Malo...

Chapter 2!!!!!!!!!Things That Should Have Happened To Malon!!!!!!!  
  
A/N: Very short because Malon isn't in Zelda a lot.  
  
BTW: TTSHHTM stands 4 Things That Should Have Happened To Malon  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Zelda. I do, however, own my diary, and this fic. Oh, and I own my Shakira CD  
  
  
  
&&&****________________________________________________***&&&  
  
TTSHHTM # 1  
  
(When Link meets Malon at Hyrule Castle)  
  
Malon: Oooooo. .Oooooo Oooooo-ooooooo…..  
  
Link: (hands over ears) …aren't you supposed to be telling me to wake up your dad?  
  
Malon: (oblivious) Oooooooo..oooooo-oooooo….  
  
Link: THAT'S IT!!!!!!!(takes out sword and cuts off Malon's arm, but is stopped by her dad before he can actually kill her)  
  
&&&***__________________________________________________***&&&  
  
TTSHHTM # 2:  
  
(Lon Lon Ranch)  
  
Malon: I think she likes you, fairy boy!!!!!!  
  
Link: Fairy boy? Fairy boy? SIC 'ER, EPONA!!!!!  
  
Epona: Neigh!!!( starts to kick Malon VERY hard)  
  
&&&***__________________________________________________***&&&  
  
TTSHHTM #3  
  
(At Lon Lon Ranch wgen Link is older)  
  
Malon: Oh, hello Fairy boy!!!!! Ingo has been treating me so badly, and he's benn beating the horses…  
  
Link: Well, you deserve it, but the horses don't….  
  
Malon: WHAT??!?!?!?!  
  
Link: ….Erm…BYE! (jumps on Epona, and rides out, running over Malon)  
  
Out side the ranch, Link finds me (again) with a box of Fruity Pebbles in my hand…  
  
Me: Hi Link!!!!! Did you get rid of….her?  
  
Link: (drooling) …yeah…can I have my Fruity Pebbles now?  
  
Me: ….um….yes, when we get back to your house, and only if you share with Navi and me!!!!  
  
Navi: ….mmmmmmm……Fruity Pebbles……  
  
  
  
And Me, Link, and Navi went to Link's House, had Fruity Pebbles, and played by Shakira CD (my idea ^_^)  
  
POLL:  
  
What do you think of this series?  
  
A: THESE ARE SO GOOD!!!!!!MAKE ONE ABOUT RUTO  
  
PLEEEEEEAAASE?  
  
B: THEY'RE GOOD!!!!  
  
C: They're all right…  
  
D: I HATE THEM!!!!STOP WRITING NOW!!!  
  
Please put your answer in your review!!!!~Artemis 


	3. Things That Should Have Happened To Ruto

Chapter 3!!!!! Ruto!!!!!!!! There will be MANY variations of each one, because of 1 reason: 1) I HATE THAT LITTLE * BLEEP * (censored 4 kids under 10, I'm 10 but I know a colorful under-my-breath-you-cant-hear-me language) so this will be fairly long.  
  
A/n: I'm gonna start putting polls in the beginning. And also, the variations have a ~ at the beginning  
  
Poll:  
  
How much o you hate Ruto?  
  
A: She has 'till my next birthday to live  
  
B: I hate her  
  
C: I could live without her  
  
D: I like her  
  
E: SHES THE BEST CHARACTER!!!!!HOW DARE YOU BE MEAN TO HER?  
  
And, you guessed it, TTSHHTR stands 4 Thing That Should Have Happened To Ruto  
  
#_____________________________#  
  
TTSHHTR #1  
  
(Link meets Ruto in Jabu Jabu)  
  
Ruto: So you see, You have to help me!  
  
Link: Umm…. No I don't!!!!!!  
  
Ruto: Yes you do!!!  
  
Link: No I don't!  
  
And so it went on for hours, until Jabu Jabu got indigestion, and barfed up Link, Ruto, and the stone. Fortunately, Ruto didn't survive.  
  
Link: Cool! Less work for me!!!!!  
  
#_____________________________#  
  
~ of #1  
  
Ruto: What took you so long? I already have the stone!!!!!!!  
  
Link: You do? Gimme it!!!!  
  
Ruto: No!!!!!!!!  
  
Link: Look, I know what your gonna say, 'This is like a Zora engagement ring' well, it's not. Not now, anyway. Give it to me or I'll light a Deku Stick.  
  
Ruto: NOOO!!!!!!! (Promptly gives Link the stone) Take it!!!!  
  
Link: Cool!!! I didn't know you were that cooperative!!!  
  
Ruto: (sneaky smile) I'm not, we're engaged!!!  
  
Link: NOOO!!! (Slices Ruto into strips of fish, takes out rice and seaweed and enjoys a sushi break)  
  
#________________________#  
  
TTSHHTR #2  
  
When Ruto gives Link the stone outside Jabu Jabu  
  
Ruto: Here, take this thing!!! I hate it!!!!!  
  
Link: ….?  
  
Ruto: My mother gave it to me, and I hate my mother, so take it!!!!!  
  
Link takes the stone, and Ruto gets beaten afterward by her father. Here's that scene:  
  
King Zora: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!? YOU GAVE AWAY THE ZORA ENGAGEMENT RING???!?!?!?!  
  
Ruto…erm… Can I phone a friend?  
  
KZ: NO!!!  
  
Ruto: WWWHHHHAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! ( a corny cartoon comes on, blocking the violence)  
  
#____________________________#  
  
~ of # 2  
  
  
  
Ruto: (stares dumbly) ….duh…  
  
Link: (chops off Ruto's hand and gets the Stone)  
  
#___________________________#  
  
TTSHHTR #3  
  
When Ruto is grown  
  
Ruto: Hey Link. Why have you kept me waiting all these years?  
  
Link: I never liked you…DIE!!!!!!(Link chops Ruto's head off)  
  
#___________________________#  
  
Ok, I realize that those were short, so please don't flame me on how short they were. 


	4. Things That Would Have Been Funny Had Th...

Chapter 4!!!!!!! This time its Nabooru (Nabby)!!!!!!! She's a cool character, though, so its gonna be 'Things that would have been funny had the happened to Nabby'  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Zelda. But I own Link!!!!!!  
  
TTWHBFHIHTN stands 4 'Things that would have been funny had the happened to Nabby'  
  
(*&*)__________________________________________(*&*)  
  
TTWHBFHIHTN #1  
  
Link meets Nabooru at the spirit temple  
  
* Nabooru is dressed in a Gap tee shirt and l.e.i jeans *  
  
Link: …?  
  
Nabooru: Yo, whassap? You been fightin' monsters and tha' junk?  
  
Link: * is still paralyzed with disbelief *  
  
Nabooru: Whadda ya starin' at? Dang, I listen to P!nk for a few, change that lame ' Desert Flower' outfit, and I be getting' looks all day!  
  
* Princess Artemis suddenly poofs in *  
  
Artemis: Nabby?  
  
Nabooru: 'Sup?  
  
Artemis: …er…. I think you should stick to ' the lame Desert Flower outfit'….  
  
Nabooru: And who are you to tell me what I wear?  
  
Artemis: Merely suggesting!!! * poofs out *  
  
Nabooru: 'Eh kid, ya see, I want these Silver Gauntlet things.. no,wait, no I don't, 'Bye!!!! * grabs some sort of keys out of her pocket, runs outside to a Blue Volkswagen Beetle *  
  
Link: I need a psyciatrist…..  
  
(*&*)_____________________________________________(*&*)  
  
TTWHBFHIHTN # 2  
  
Link sees Nabby in that swirly sand thing  
  
Nabby: * still dressed in Gap and l.e.i * Link!!!! Get me the $%#@ out of here!!! These &*^%$ing hags took me away while I was at the mall!!!  
  
Link: …?…  
  
Nabby: GET ME THE &%$#* OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!  
  
Link: ….ok….. C'MERE, YOU STUPID HAGS!!!!!  
  
  
  
* Hags 'c'mere' and get their butts kicked by Link *  
  
  
  
(*&*)____________________________________________(*&*)  
  
Ok, I realize that was SUPER SHORT, But Nabby only appears like twice In the Game!!!!!  
  
POLL:  
  
Whitch Character should I do next?  
  
Saria  
  
Darunia  
  
Mido  
  
Other ( Who? _________) 


End file.
